Helping your Child through Grief

    For adopted children, grief may come in waves; changing over time, in small and large doses. There is no one answer as each child, and the circumstances of his adoption are different. It is our job as parents to help our child thought the grieving process. Here are a few ideas: 

Healthy Activity- Dance, Sports, Hobbies, Youth Groups, Clubs, etc.

Lifebooks- Create a Lifebook for your child. Work on it together. Use it as a tool to tell his life story and open up the lines of communication

Put it on Paper- Encourage your child to use a journal to write down his thoughts, if she is too young, have her draw a picture.

Make a Memory Box- Keep treasures relating to adoption, birth family, culture, etc.

Start a New Family Tradition- use your child’s input; make it center around him.

Listen to your Child
When your child does talk about his birth family, it is important to answer questions honestly and gently, as is age appropriate. Empathize and validate his feelings. Don’t be judgmental or invalidate feelings. Don’t lay blame or take anything he has personally.

Be Supportive and Seek Help when Needed
Find a grief support group
Adoptive children group
Find a therapist with adoption experience 


 

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